Reopening: Protecting Children...What Can I Do?

I am an introvert at heart.  That doesn’t mean I don’t LIKE people or enjoy socializing, but in order for me to recharge I require solitude.  When this whole COVID-19 thing first started back in March, I have to be honest…I didn’t mind being at home.  But as this has now continued for months, even my introverted self is craving human contact.  This time has given me a lot of time to reflect on how fortunate I am to have a job where I am able to work from home and make a difference…how fortunate I am to have my son with me during this time.  But one thing that keeps coming up for me during this time of solitude is how difficult this must be for children in homes that are not SAFE.  Children who have spent the past few months at home with the very people who are abusing them, away from the safety and respite that school provides – away from the teachers, counselors, and youth workers who are most often the ones who report their abuse and help get them out of their unsafe situation.  The children who come from those hard places are the ones my heart breaks for right now. 

Serving as the Executive Director for the Indiana Center for Prevention of Youth Abuse and Suicide during this stressful time has been a humbling reminder of our shared humanity and vulnerability.  We are all experiencing feelings of uncertainty, frustration, and even grief as our schools and communities grapple with the unenviable task of safely reopening.  Generally, I try not to wallow in the “what ifs”, preferring to seek solutions and answers that I am comfortable living with.  In this situation, the “what ifs” seem too many to count and I find myself wondering what I can do to make things better.  Our children will go back to school and wear masks and practice social distancing.  Children are remarkably resilient by nature.  They will navigate these changes often far better than we adults will and frankly, they will take their cues from us.  So, I will wear my mask and wash my hands and do my best. 

But what can we do for these children who will come back to school after months of isolation with an abuser?  We can educate ourselves, so we know how to recognize and respond to signs of abuse.  We are all mandated reporters in the state of Indiana.  This means that we all have a duty to report suspected child abuse.  We can open our eyes to the signs of stress, depression and anxiety and learn what those look like at different age levels.  We can seek out help if we are feeling stressed, depressed, or anxious.  We can model for our children that taking care of our mental health is normal and ok.  We’ve all heard the quote from Mr. Rogers, “Look for the helpers”.  We can become the “helpers”.

As schools start back in a myriad of different ways, it’s important for children to know where they can get help and how to advocate for themselves.  The messages that the ICPYAS team delivers to children in schools throughout our community are more important now than ever.  Making sure that these children know that they deserve to be safe and that abuse is not their fault is a powerful weapon against abusers. 

I am grateful for the resilience, creativity, and quick action of the ICPYAS team as they have adapted to working remotely and delivering our programs virtually, knowing now more than ever, that our community is vulnerable and in need of support.  I am grateful for the commitment of our Board members in making prevention a priority, even during a crisis.  I am grateful for our donors that partner with us in serving the children and families of Indiana. We absolutely cannot do this without YOU.

Please take good care of yourselves, your families, and your loved ones.

Gratefully,

Melissa Peregrin, Executive Director